Wedding Week | The Location and Set Up

Welcome to Wedding Week! All this week I’m going to be sharing details from our winter wedding weekend which took place on the 21st and 22nd of November in Scotland. I’ll be showing you how we pulled our day together, relaying all the emotions from the occasion and hopefully providing you with some inspiration and tips.

An Introduction…

So it’s here. Finally. 15 months after I wrote my first wedding related post on the blog (which was written 1 week after the proposal and funnily enough already mentions some of the suppliers and websites we ended up using!) I find myself penning a week’s worth of thoughts on the day itself.

That in itself is a difficult concept. Throughout the whole year that I wrote my Wedding Wednesday series, I was positively bursting to talk about everything we had planned. To fill you in on the details and inspiration and ideas. To share the lace I’d chosen for my dress that week or the floral arch ideas I’d sent to the florist or the signs I’d made for the venue. But of course I couldn’t. I wanted to keep all of those things under wraps until the day had arrived. But then what inevitably happens is that once the wedding day has been and gone you’re left with a long list of content waiting to be shared and you’re not sure where to start.

It’s been three months (yesterday!) since our wedding, two months since we jetted off on our honeymoon adventure and one month since we found ourselves back in London and back to reality. And yet writing our very own wedding week for the first time today is already a surreal experience. I still have to remind myself occasionally that I’m married. That it all happened. That my year of wedding planning has been and gone, that I’ve worn my dress and said my vows and got the ring on to prove it. That that hazy dream – like day that doesn’t feel quite real actually took place and all the hard work from the year previous gave way to a magical celebration with the people we love.

I’m sure others who are recently married will know exactly what I’m talking about when I say that the few months following the wedding are a strange time, a time where if you’re anything like me you’ll find yourself almost mourning the fact that you no longer have a dress designer to visit every two weeks, or a florist to chat to about colour schemes or a reason to sit and practice calligraphy each night. Of course in many ways that’s a relief too – I’ve been busier than ever already this year and it’s been good to no longer have wedding admin taking over the to-do list – but sometimes, at the strangest moments, it hits you hard that you’ll never have that experience again, and that day that went so fast and is somewhat of a blur in your memories, cannot be re-lived no matter how hard you wish it to be so.

Which is why these photographs And my words, are so important, and why I wanted to document our wedding, and every little detail of it, in the best way I could on my own blog, so that I’ll always have this space, this week, this feature to look back on and remind me of the parts that are hazy, remind me of the magic, the fun, and… well all the hard work. Because the decorations get thrown out, the props will no doubt go on to someone else and the dress goes back to hanging in a garment bag. But the photos remind us that it did happen, and that the year of organising, planning, researching, pinning, buying, booking, creating, making, crying, stressing, laughing, writing and more crying was all worth it.

So this is our wedding. And these are our memories. And despite the fact I told myself that I’d make this feature more picture heavy than word heavy, I can see already that that isn’t going to happen, so I’m going to pour my heart out and tell you all about it. Welcome to Wedding Week.

Where it all began…

One of the best parts about our wedding (in my humble opinion) was that it wasn’t just that one day. We wanted it to be an experience, a holiday, and a memorable occasion where our families and friends got to know each other better. So we rented a group of cottages and had all of our family and close friends stay with us in the days leading up to, and after the actual wedding day. Of course because of the type of DIY wedding that we had, this was also rather necessary as we needed extra hands, capable minds, and reliable allies to help us set everything up and pull it all together. But it was also one of the best decisions we made, as for us, the celebrations started long before the sun had even come up on that Saturday.

So today’s post is a little about the location and venues we chose, why we chose them and what took place in the run up to the wedding. Perhaps seeing these pictures will help you understand why we were so set on an outdoor ceremony!!

The Location and Venues…

One of the earliest decisions regarding our wedding was that it would take place in Scotland (more of a confirmation than a decision really). It’s the country I grew up in and I’m immensely proud to be Scottish. I genuinely think that Scotland is one of the most beautiful countries in the world and there was no backdrop I could imagine that would have been better for our day than the rustic Scottish countryside (even if it had of rained). Luckily GB felt the same way and was probably more excited than me at the idea of hosting a Scottish ceilidh and getting everyone to try Scotch whisky.

With my family being in the North of Scotland, GB’s in the Midlands and friends all over, we decided central Scotland would be the best bet as it would be a good half way point for both families and reasonably easy for people from both sides to travel to. But other than that we didn’t have a specific location in mind – this part of Scotland isn’t my home turf and therefore we had no idea where to begin looking. Central Scotland actually spans a pretty big area and as we navigated our way through venue upon venue we found this to be one of the toughest parts of planning.

Perhaps this was down to the criteria we had set our hearts on – we’d identified almost straight away that we didn’t want to stay (or get married) in a hotel but that we did want somewhere big enough to house all of our close family (parents, siblings and grandparents) and close friends (Best Women, Best Men and their partners), or as we were instead affectionately referring to them; #TeamWedding. This was so that they could be hands on with the set up (we have lots of creative friends and family) and so that we could have a way to thank them for their hard work by providing comfortable accommodation, as well as giving us quality time with them all before and after the day, as we knew from speaking to others that you barely get a chance to talk to those closest to you on the wedding day (which is so true).

At that early stage we had a rough idea of having a simple ceremony – preferably outdoors and in a rustic countryside setting – and then hosting a big knees up afterwards, either at the same location (house party?) or finding a space big enough near by (village hall, old barn?). We’d already established that hiring a marquee or Tipi and simply finding the location was way beyond our budget and so we knew whatever venue we found would have to work hard to set the scene for our then growing Pinterest dreams.

So we targeted our search on the most important part first – the accommodation, and figured once we’d found that, we’d look for the nearest suitable party venue (if it wasn’t in the same place). Finding accommodation to house 30 people however was no mean feat and we visited everything from abandoned castles, to ex school trip bunk accommodation, to large houses, to B&B’s on country manors, to farms and estates, to outdoor sports facilities where you can rent the whole park, stay in bunkhouses and ride quad bikes all weekend. But we kept hitting a wall. Either the accommodation would be great but wouldn’t have a big enough outside space to host the ceremony, or would be situated on a not so nice street in a not so rustic location, or the location and scenery would be amazing but not have enough accommodation to house us all.

We tried looking at it from the other side and searched for party venues that suited our idea of a rustic Scottish affair, with the hope that we’d find accommodation nearby but again walls kept appearing. The barn venues we loved were either so far out of budget it was laughable or fully booked for two years in advance. Village Halls were often in random little towns that we had no special connection to and lacked the character that had become important to us. Castles felt eery and not quite right for the warm, happy celebration we craved and function rooms were just too dull.

By the time Christmas 2014 had rolled around we had begun to lose all hope.

But then, after some rigorous searching by all involved, and relentless scrolling through wedding blogs by me, we stumbled upon two potential venues almost around the same time that seemed like they might just be exactly what we were looking for, within budget and by happy accident were only 15 minutes apart. One was a group of cottages on a large countryside estate which could sleep up to 36 and one was a small barn venue set up for weddings, which I’d found through Love My Dress after seeing this wedding there.

We scheduled a visit in for them both around three days before Christmas and knew this was our last chance to get something booked and a date set before the year was out. We’d seen a few photos of the barn online (mainly the wedding above) and we’d both immediately loved the simplicity of it and the gorgeous setting, and along with the rave reviews about the food and the friendliness of the owners, we had a really good feeling that it might be the place for us. But at this time the venue was still quite new and therefore there wasn’t a whole lot of info or imagery online, so we knew that we couldn’t make a proper decision until we’d seen it in person.

The barn at Dalduff Farm

We rocked up to, what would become our barn venue, for the first time on the 22nd December 2014 at around 4pm when it was already dark, had been raining a lot and was freezing cold, and yet even then we could imagine our wedding party being held there. The space was big enough but not too big to be daunting when it came to decorating it all ourselves. The owner was genuine, friendly and helpful. And the setting was the undone, rustic and charming character filled space we’d been dreaming of. It was perfect. They have ceremonies there all of the time – in both the beautiful garden at the back, in the main barn or in one of the other out buildings – but despite the adorable farm setting, we still had our hearts set on our original dream of that simple ceremony in the gardens of our accommodation. So as much as we loved the barn, everything rested on the accommodation being right, and the setting being able to host a wedding ceremony.

Balbeg Country Estate

But as soon as we drove up the tiny track road leading to the cottages, (that had originally belonged to a charity but had been bought over by a friendly family and were now rented out as holiday accommodation) and found ourselves at the top of that hill in a valley of Scottish mountains I knew we’d struck gold. A group of three cottages and one large wooden lodge – which were all so beautifully kitted out like country homes with wood burning fires and large living spaces easily able to accommodate our group of 30 and perfect for hanging out in – awaited us, and would you believe it but they were situated on a hill surrounded by tall Scottish woodland. The main house had the perfect bridal getting ready room, while the lodge had the perfect communal area that felt like a woodland hut. A little path led from the lodge up to the entrance of the woods where towering trees provided an amazing roof canopy, and immediately it felt right. I knew instantly that this was the very spot I wanted to get married in.

And just like that, we’d found our dream wedding location. The only problem was that the barn had only two dates left in 2015; the 21st March (a mere 12 weeks away!) or the 21st November. We’d been imagining a spring wedding, I’d been pinning spring flowers and garden games and already had visions of a sunny day spent outdoors, but 12 weeks to organise everything felt like an enormous task and so we found ourselves asking whether we could instead imagine a winter wedding, with cosy fires and toasted marshmallows and sparklers to end the night… and we decided the answer was yes! The Pinterest boards were shifted slightly, the inspiration adjusted but the plan was the same – an outdoor, rustic (and now woodland themed), simple, undone wedding in the countryside. In November. In Scotland. Were we mad?

But when you see that bed of coloured leaves which became our carpet and those tall trees which became our walls, you will perhaps see why, despite everyone telling us it wouldn’t be possible and to cut our losses and have the ceremony at the barn ‘just in case’, we clung onto that dream of an outdoor woodland wedding until the very last hour and refused to give in even when everything was against us.

The Set Up and days before…

Setting up our two venues ready for the wedding day was an exhausting task for all involved. For us a DIY wedding was the only wedding we’d ever have had – it was what was within budget for us, what was possible and what felt right for two creative people and one control freak who wouldn’t have been able to rest letting someone else arrange my tables – but I don’t think either of us ever contemplated quite what an enormous task it would be, both in the year of planning and in that week before. Despite having 30 extra pairs of hands around to help, setting up two seperate venues completely from scratch with no outside help was a job and a half and we had to let go of a lot of ideas and compromise on a lot of plans in those final hours just to get it done. I can’t say that it was all exactly as I imagined, and I still have little niggles about some of the things that weren’t quite right or that we didn’t have time for, but the result we reached was absolutely the result of a LOT of hard work, passion and creativity from the people closest to us. It was rough around the edges, but it was real and it was homemade.

Were I able to go back in time knowing what I now know, would I do it all the same? I’m not sure. A little relaxation the day before my wedding wouldn’t have gone a miss. And had our budget stretched to it, an on the day co-ordinator who could have taken care of all the little things that we couldn’t on the day itself would have made life a whole lot easier. But ultimately we made it work. If I had any advice for brides planning a similar approach it would simply be not to underestimate just how much work you are setting yourself up for, and make sure you have really REALLY good people around you who are willing to get stuck in and help.

The majority of our set up was at the barn venue, as we were aiming to keep the ceremony venue as simple as possible and let the setting do most of the talking. The plan originally was to tackle the bigger set up tasks such as stringing festoon lights, unloading furniture, dropping off props and arranging flowers on the Thursday so that Friday could be dedicated solely to styling, decor and finesse. But of course none of this went to plan. As I’ve mentioned previously the weather the week leading up to our day was most definitely NOT on our side. Storm Abigail had been brewing around us and the few days before the wedding were some of the worst weather conditions I’ve ever witnessed in that part of Scotland. It rained, it poured, it hailed, the wind thrashed and the cold was bitter. The boys made one attempt at putting up the lights on Thursday afternoon before nearly getting swept off their stepladders and having to retreat.

And so when we awoke to more torrential rain on Friday morning, we knew we had the whole task ahead of us and a deadline looming.

This was what the barn looked like when we arrived – a complete blank canvas

The first few hours were pretty frantic but with the rain still falling, it gave us a chance to concentrate on the indoor locations and not worry too much about the outside tasks, and everyone was raring to go at this point so things started happening very quickly and suddenly the place was a buzz and flurry of activity. GB’s Dad and his wife turned horticulturalists and weaved together meters and meters of ivy and foliage to be hung from windows and around door frames. GB’s Mum and her husband got the power tools out and set to work on the DIY – putting signs together, hanging props and nailing nails into doors. The Best Men hung frames to walls, and eventually when the sun finally made a rare appearance got the festoon lights up. Friends put decorations together, set up tables, created photo walls and arranged flowers. My brother set up the stage and tested out all the music equipment. My Dad drove for supplies and unloaded props. My Mum arranged glasses, planted flowers in pots, set up a beautiful cake table and made our cards table look pretty.

And slowly but surely it started to come together. We arrived at the barn at 9am that morning, people came and went throughout the day but at around 7pm that evening having barely stopped all day to eat more than a Kit Kat and grab a cup of tea, we finally placed the last vase on the table and propped up the final plant pot outside.

Exhausted but relieved we made our way back to the cottages where we’d arranged a dinner for everyone (a couple of our Chef skilled friends had taken charge of the cooking and created a feast) to say a big thanks for all of the hard work.

This Friday evening was undoubtedly one of my favourite parts of the weekend. It was the first time in weeks that I’d felt truly relaxed. Nervous of course, but no longer stressed. I knew we’d done all we could and the hard part was behind us. I felt so grateful to everyone around us for all of the work they’d put in, just to help us have the day we’d imagined. I felt so lucky to have such an amazing group of family and friends who would go to such lengths for us, and I was just so full of love for everyone in the room. I shed a few tears that evening and had to avoid my Mum like the plague as we kept threatening to set each other off, but that feeling of warmth and happiness and excitement for what lay ahead won’t be easily forgotten. The wedding weekend had officially begun.

Once all the food had been devoured, a few relaxing drinks been consumed, my absolute troopers of Best Women had tackled the final few tasks of filling confetti cones and arranging favours, and the stresses and exhaustion of the day had been let go by everyone over friendly chatter and excited talk of what lay ahead, it was time for GB and I to say our goodbyes and head off for our final night apart before the big day.

Thankfully earlier in the day some of the guys had made their way back to this venue and had begun nailing signs in the ground and clearing furniture out of the lodge ready for the ceremony, but with the weather still so unpredictable we hadn’t been able to properly prepare the ground outside to house 100 guests and at this stage we had little hope that our outdoor ceremony would even happen. We both reluctantly agreed that an indoor ceremony might just have to be our lot, prepared ourselves for a very rainy wedding day and I handed over all of my lists and drawings and ideas for how the indoor room should be set up, leaving the remaining preparation in the hands of the boys the following morning. GB headed off to spend the evening with his Best Men at the lodge while I settled in for a night with my girls in the main house.

This was it. My final night. After 13 months of planning, we were at the eve of our event. Tomorrow was our wedding day and whatever awaited us, we’d be married by the afternoon. ALL. THE. FEELS.

….Tune in tomorrow to read the first installment from the day and find out just how I felt on the morning of my wedding.

Professional Imagery – Amy Shore Photography | Set up Photos – iPhone snaps from friends

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