Wedding Week | The Morning Of…

Welcome to Wedding Week! All this week I’m going to be sharing details from our winter wedding weekend which took place on the 21st and 22nd of November in Scotland. I’ll be showing you how we pulled our day together, relaying all the emotions from the occasion and hopefully providing you with some inspiration and tips.

I sat up in bed at the crack of dawn on the morning of my wedding feeling like I hadn’t shut my eyes for even one single second of the night before. I’d tried of course. Many times. In fact I tried so hard to will my brain to shut off and stop talking to me that in doing so I probably succeeded in keeping myself awake. In my sleepless state while my Best Women slept around me I rewrote my speech in my head and tried to imagine the new indoor version of the ceremony that lay ahead of us as I listened to the wind howl and rain thrash against the bedroom window. Little eventualities kept popping into my head – what if not all our guests could fit in the narrow wooden room that was our back up? Would that mean that those who stood outside would see me in my dress for the first time before GB did?  Didn’t I have a vague memory of some corrugated iron at the door to prevent slipping? What if my dress got caught in that and ripped before I’d even got down the aisle? What if me and my Dad couldn’t fit down the aisle side by side once all the chairs were in there? Would we have to shuffle down sideways until we reached the top? What if it was still raining like it was now by the time the ceremony began? How would I get over to the other cottage without surely getting soaked and ruining my dress?

All those worries and I hadn’t even thought about the party yet! What if the buses due to pick everyone up couldn’t make it up the small dirt track? What if guests couldn’t make it up the small dirt track?? What if the location was so remote that people couldn’t find it? Aaah why can’t I go to sleep!!!

I must have slept at least a little bit though as I’m sure I was asleep right before my alarm went off and I found it was morning. The morning of my wedding. The actual day!! I was getting married!! Holy sh*t!!!! If I was nervous the evening before and nervous all through the sleepless night then what I felt as my eyes opened for the first time that morning was nerves like I’d never felt before. My stomach was churning with half giddy excitement and half ‘oh em geeeee I’m going to have a panic attack I’m so scared’. I sat jittering in the dark of the room for a few minutes before I couldn’t take it any longer and had to shake my Best Woman Helen up who was in the bed next to me. She groggily attempted an excitable ‘you’re getting married today eeee’ before turning over and burying her head back into the pillow.

I was quite glad when my other three Best Women came pounding into the room and jumped on the bed with me saying they were too excited to sleep any longer. We chatted for a while in bed before I announced I was too nervous to sit for even one more second and had to get up. So I got out of bed and jumped in the shower.

And that was it – we were up!! The day had begun (well most of us were up – Helen continued to bury her head under the pillow for a good half an hour after the light had been switched on and the activity had commenced). I can remember almost breaking down in tears in the shower as I began to imagine walking towards GB and saying the vows… But knowing that if I let the tears start they’d never stop, I took a deep breath and told myself I wasn’t allowed to think about that moment, not yet at least. I just had to take things one step at a time.

By the time I was out of the shower it was almost time for our hairdresser Gillian to arrive. When she’d told me she’d get there for 7.30am in order to have plenty of time I thought she was mad. But right enough she was still pinning flowers in people’s hair up until the final second so I’m very glad she took the initiative and arrived early. Just before then I’d sneaked into my Mum and Dad’s room to give them a hug and I could tell my Mum had already been crying. As we hugged each other I realised that this day was almost as monumental for them as it was for me.

The excitement had ramped up by the time I heard Gillian coming up the stairs bright and breezy and chatting away to my Mum. I’d only met Gillian from Pin Up Hair (I won’t go into detail about all the suppliers in this post but check back at the end of the week for details on everyone we used) once before the wedding but I was so glad I’d booked her on the day – she was such a brilliant person to have around and even at such an early hour was chatty, excited and just loads of fun.

She got to work right away and started setting my Mum and Best Women’s hair in rollers while I sat on the bed chatting and wondering what on earth to do with myself. At this early stage in the morning I had absolutely nothing to do and it was terrifying! After weeks and months of being so busy I hadn’t stopped, now the day was here and everything was getting taken care of for me, everything was out of my control and all I had to do was sit… and relax. But as any bride will tell you, there is no way to relax on the morning of your wedding – you feel as if your insides might burst at any second.

My brother, clearly a little uncomfortable at being in a house full of excitable girls, had been tasked with making breakfast for us all. My Dad, also keen to find a use for himself amongst all the activity, drove off to our party venue to drop some things off. One of my Best Women was getting her hair done, the other in the shower and the remaining two had gone downstairs to try and help with breakfast when it became apparent that this was taking longer than it should have. Everyone had a task but me.

It was just at this point when I was starting to get a little jittery, that my Mum came up the stairs with what I can only describe as a horrified look on her face. Immediately assuming the worse, I jumped off the bed and ran to her to ask what was wrong. She looked at me and said ‘Rob (GB’s brother) has just been over, and first of all… he doesn’t want you to worry’…

WHAT? OMG WHAT?

…’But they’ve decided to go for it and set up for a ceremony outdoors in the woods’.

OMG.

I realised that it was still so early we hadn’t even opened the curtains yet or looked outside. After the stormy weather I’d listened to all through the night I guess I’d just assumed it was still like that now. Actually I don’t know what I’d assumed, the couple of hours since I’d woken up had just kind of happened without me thinking much of anything at all other than ‘Oh my gawd I’m so nervous’.

I ran to the window, flung the curtains open and saw what I can only describe as – exactly what I’d had in my mind the whole year previous in which we’d imagined a winter wedding. It was the cold, crisp, yet sunny, winters day we’d longed for. There was even snow! It was still relatively dusky at this time in the morning but the sun had started to come up and was peeking out over the hills which were all topped with a sprinkling of white snow.

But then I panicked. Throughout my sleepless night and worrying about all the eventualities, I’d kind of prepared myself for the indoor ceremony. I’d run through the steps in my head and I knew where to go and what to do. This was a new plan. A plan I wasn’t prepared for. I didn’t know where things were going to be laid out or where the aisle would be. I didn’t know where I’d be walking or where guests would be standing. I didn’t know if my shoes or dress would cope with potentially muddy forest floor. It was a new plan. Now I understood why my Mum had looked so worried, she’d probably been thinking the same thing herself.

My Best Women had all re-appeared by this point and the six of us (plus Gillian) had a few minutes of turmoil while I repeatedly asked the most important question over and over – ‘Will I be able to walk up that hill in my heels?’ – before Best Woman Andrea (sorry there’s four of them – once I’ve introduced them all I will just call them by their names) put a stop to all the chatter (as she does so well) with one extremely concise and profound statement.

‘Jaclyn. This is what you both wanted remember? This is what you’ve been praying for this whole year, right?’

And she was right. It was. We had. GB was doing what he knew I would want, what he knew we’d look back on and be so grateful we were able to do. What we’d regret for ever if we didn’t at least try.

‘You’re right!’ I exclaimed. ‘I trust Stu. If he says we can do it, let’s do it!’ And suddenly I was beyond excited. The outdoor woodland wedding ceremony we’d hoped and prayed and longed for was actually going to happen, and it might even be sunny! We all jumped around for a bit and let out little squeals of excitement, before my Brother came up to announce breakfast was finally ready and asked ‘So what’s the deal then? We doing this thing outside or what?’ to which I replied ‘It’s the dream Bob. It’s always been the dream. We’re going for it!’.

He chuckled and then trooped back down the stairs shouting ‘It’s the dream!!’ as he went. It was happening.

Meanwhile…

Little did I know that the boys had been up since around 6am and were working away like troopers to get everything set up according to my drawings. They’d seen the perfect weather and frosty ground and bed of autumn leaves lightly covered in a sprinkling of snow and decided that it would be silly not to attempt the outdoor ceremony we’d dreamed of. I’ll forever be grateful to them for taking this decision out of my hands and just going ahead, as had I had the choice I might have been too nervous to say yes myself. It was undoubtadely the right decision and gave way to a ceremony that I’ll remember for the rest of my life.

They had been working hard all morning. Chairs had been carried outside, vases filled with flowers, confetti set up and cars driven out of the way and slowly our ceremony space was starting to take shape…

Back to the girls…

I was still overly concerned about the – walking in 4 inch heels on a forest floor – situation however and questioned whether I should instead just wear the boots I’d bought for doing our photographs instead. Not to mention the fact that I had one heavily pregnant Best Woman who was also planning on wearing heels. Knowing that we couldn’t go outside and risk running into the boys setting up, we sent my Dad out to investigate the situation and report back.

He came back reporting that the ground was as hard as nails (no chance of heel sinkage), a thick frost was on the ground, the sun had came out, the boys were doing a grand job of setting up and everything was looking really, really great. At which point I let out a gigantic sigh and gave my Dad the biggest hug. If he told me it was ok, it was ok. By now we were in the kitchen and breakfast was about to be served up (although I wasn’t sure I could eat a thing) and out of the corner of my eye I caught a glimpse of GB walking down the path towards the conservatory next to us (where all the flowers and some of the decorations had been stored). I let out a squeal, gave my Best Women a flash of a horrified expression and darted out of the room and up the stairs quicker than I could say ‘He’s not allowed to see meeeeeee!’.

A few minutes later a plate of scrambled eggs on toast was brought up to me with a strict instruction that I was no longer allowed downstairs as the boys were coming in and out. I attempted a few small mouthfuls while sat on a wicker chair in one of the bedrooms while watching the girls buzz in and out one by one. After about ten minutes of chewing slower than I have ever chewed in my life and fighting off extreme nausea while feeling like I hadn’t even made a dent in the plate of food, I decided that eating wasn’t going to happen this morning and gave up. My Mum assured me she’d get me some tea and toast before the ceremony just so I had something inside me and her saying that made me feel better even though I think we both knew it wasn’t actually going to happen.

It was now around 9.30am and Gillian was calling me through as it was my turn to get my hair done. Finally, I felt like I had something to do and the prep was beginning. I’d worried a lot in the run up to the wedding that I might not like relinquishing control on the morning, letting other people do my hair and make up, and trusting GB and the boys to set up the ceremony just to my liking. But to my surprise it was quite the opposite and relinquishing control at this stage was the most wonderful thing. I had no space in my brain to make any decisions or think about what should be happening and when it should be happening and it was amazing just to sit back and let other people work their magic. I’d advise any bride to do as little as possible on the morning of their wedding and simply trust that things will happen. Having my hair and make up done was actually one of my favourite parts of the day!

While Gillian was curling and pinning and backcombing, our photographers arrived (both like kids in a sweet shop and so excited at the surroundings and weather that awaited them. This was their first Scottish wedding and they just couldn’t get over the scenery!) and my Dad came in with a card and present from GB. We’d decided not to do big presents and instead just give each other something small and sentimental. With all the craziness of the weeks before the wedding anything more than this would have been too much, and when I got his present I was so glad we’d gone this way. I opened the card and began to feels tears on my face after only the first line. I’d kept trying to put thoughts of him out of my mind up until that point because the emotion of it was all too much, but suddenly here were his words on a card and I could imagine him speaking them to me and I couldn’t read it. I handed it over to Andrea mid sob, who read it aloud for me and as such had the whole room in tears as well as me. He’s a good egg is my husband

The present comprised of three parts – a past, present and future – and each one was a little memory of a date we’d had or a gift he’d given me or something we’d talked about for our future married life – it was lovely. I’d done something similar for him and had personalised passport covers made for us both in our wedding colours and with our initials stamped on the front, ready for our future adventures together.

After that, the rest of the morning started to go by incredibly quickly. Suddenly after chatting away excitedly to Gillian for a while, I realised she’d finished and spun my hair into the most wonderful ethereal, undone up-do and it was onto make up with my lovely make up artist friend Rosie. Luckily I’d had both a hair and make up trial beforehand and the girls knew what they were doing but there were still a few things we hadn’t decided on like eyeshadow colour, black or brown eyeliner and which lipstick I’d go for out of the three I’d bought! But on the day I no longer had any indecision – I just let Rosie do what she thought was best and felt totally relaxed in her hands.

As everything was happening around me, I would get small updates here and there from various people. Things like ‘Sophie (the florist) is here! The arch is going up!’ and ‘I’ve just seen so-and-so, they’re looking fab!’ would catch my ear every so often but other than that I was in my own little bubble and had very little idea what was occurring on the other side of the hill…

Back at the Lodge…

Sophie (from I Heart Flowers) had indeed arrived and was in the process of setting up what would become the most glorius floral arch you ever did see for us to get married under, and the boys were back at the lodge and getting ready themselves.

You might not be able to tell, but I look at these photos of GB and immediately see how nervous he was. Clearly the tying of bowties was a task which stumped them all for quite some time (you’d have thought this might be something they learned in the year before the wedding hey?) and eventually they had to call over the husband of one of my Best Women (and the only person in our group of 30 who actually knew how to tie a bowtie) to get the job done.

Back to the bridal madness…

Suddenly time had completely whizzed by and I found myself at the stage of being ready to put the dress on. As I slipped into my bridal underwear and came back out of the bathroom in nothing but my silk shorts and cami pyjama set, Sophie arrived carrying our beautiful bouquets and I was so excited I threw myself on her in a big bear hug – to which she looked quite bemused. But they were just so beautiful! My Mum came in to help me into the dress and I felt like my whole body was shaking by this point. I don’t have super clear memories of exactly what was being said or done as all of this happened, as it was such a blur of activity, but I remember standing in the middle while a crowd of people flurried around me. Holding my hand as I stepped into the shoes, pinning the waistband in as I tried to breathe, attaching a cape to my shoulders as someone else handed me a pile of rings.

True friendship right there!!! One clear memory was when I spotted the loveliest little addition to the sleeve of my dress which was a complete surprise. My dressmaker had taken the time to sew in GB and I’s initials and I nearly wept with emotion when I saw it for the first time. At which point my Best Woman Laura, who was having the final adjustments done to her hair and couldn’t see what was going on, shouted ‘OMG what’s wrong? Someone please tell me what’s happening?’. I also remember Helen helping me put on all of my midi rings very clearly. I’m so grateful to her for this moment and for being so calm as my hands were shaking and I couldn’t figure out which ring went on which finger. She simply handed me the one I needed one at a time and told me which finger to put it on. I’m also very grateful to Andrea for the moment you see above when putting the dress on – that’s true friendship right there!

It was only when the dress was on, the jewellery and accessories attached, Gillian had hugged me and said her goodbyes and my Brother and Dad had come up to see me, that it all became real. Suddenly the nerves had come back and filled my whole body again. When Evonne our Humanist came in to see if I was ready and wish me luck it became REALLY real and it took all my willpower and heavy breathing not to break down right there.

There was just time for a quick toast with everyone before we made our way down the stairs and got ready to go. I kissed my Brother and Mum goodbye as they made their way up to the woods and then I stood in the conservatory with my Dad and Best Women as we did a final lipstick on teeth check and a few deep breaths. I remember looking at the clock and exclaiming that I was half an hour late to my own wedding, before Amy our photographer assured me that the clock was 15 mins fast.

Still. The time had come. GB was waiting for me. It was time to have our wedding…

Tune in tomorrow to read all about our beautiful woodland wedding ceremony!

Key Players (a full run down of all of our suppliers will follow at the end of the week)

 Photography – Amy Shore Photography

Hair Stylist – Pin Up Hair Glasgow

Make Up – Rosie Lewis (a friend)

Florist – I Heart Flowers

Location – Balbeg Country Estate

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